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EASY MONEY

EASY MONEY

Show Notes

Sometimes we get lost. 

When was the last time you felt lost?

How did you find your way?

This week, I’m having a conversation with Samantha Nielsen about her journey.

I’m hoping you find something in this conversation that makes your journey easier.

Samantha is a divorced mother of three and a fierce advocate for divorcees. 

As a Divorce Coach, she believes that divorce is always an option—despite what family, societal or religious traditions promote. 

As a member of a conservative Christian faith, Samantha invites her clients to make God apart of the divorcing process. “Partnering with God enables us to tap into a power which is greater than our own.” 

Samantha works privately with divorcing men and women— empowering her clients to step away from the belief that their divorce is something to be viewed as a failure and shameful. In fact, Samantha believes that divorce is both a necessary resource AND can be a blessing in disguise. 

Want to connect with Samantha? You can find her at www.myldsdivorce.com or on Instagram @myldsdivorce. 

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Description:

Welcome to Easy Money. I’m Jill the Money Coach. I know what it’s like to push through to white knuckle it to put in the time and get no results. I know what it’s like to wonder what’s the right way, and to constantly worry about doing it all wrong. I’ve learned a whole lot from doing things the hard way. That’s why I help coaches go from doing everything the hard way to making money easy. You want to create your dream life and dream business. That’s all about being free to do what you want. Spend what you want, and build the future you want. And do it all with ease. In this podcast, I bring you Simple Strategies for Success for your business that make money easy. So it’s time for Easy Money. Are you ready? Well, then let’s go. 

Welcome to Easy Money Podcast. I am so happy that you’re back. Boy, I hope you’re having a great summer. How was your Fourth of July weekend? I had an amazing time with family and it was awesome. So I have such a treat for you today. I know I’ve had lots of treats for you. This summer has been a summer of treats because I have had so many amazing conversations with coaches, and today is no exception. I am chatting today with Samantha Nielsen and she is a divorced mother of three and a fierce advocate for divorce day for stays. I can’t even say that word. As a divorce coach. She believes that a divorce is always an option. Despite what family societal or religious traditions promote. As a member of conservative Christian faith, Samantha invites her clients to make God a part of the divorcing process. Partnering with God, she says enables us to tap into a power which is greater than our own. Samantha works privately with divorcing men and women empowering her clients to step away from the belief that their divorce is something to be viewed as a failure and shameful. In fact, Samantha believes that divorce is both a necessary resource and can be a blessing in disguise. So I hope after you listen to this conversation, you connect with Samantha you can find her@www.my, LDS divorce.com or on Instagram at my LDS divorce. Oh, I hope you enjoy this conversation with Samantha. 

Okay, Samantha, thank you so much for joining me on Easy Money Podcast. I’m so happy to have you here. It’s so good to connect with you again.

Hello. Hello, Jill. It’s good to see you too.

Yeah. So I always read, you know, the formal bio, before we record, but I always love for people to get to know, not just the professional coach, right, but the, you know, the person that’s in our bio, but the person the real person, like, what do you like? What do you do in your free time? Or what do you what’s important to you? What excites you? Anything you want to share with us?

Thank you. Yes. As you mentioned, I am a certified coach. And then that’s how we’ve come together and become dear friends and acquaintances. So of course, I love coaching and all things coaching. But that’s just one small segment of my life. I really am a very involved mother of three. I am a divorced mother, middle aged woman, right. 48 years old and so proud of that. But I have three beautiful children two are grown and out of the house, and one is still at home with me in high school. And so I love of course spending time with my kids. But when it comes to my personal development and my personal interests, I think time and connection with family and friends is what really takes the top of the list every time. I’m a people person. I love planning lunch events. I love going out for long walks, making phone calls, writing, you know, birthday cards, anything that gets me back in touch with those that matter in my life. brings me a lot of joy.

That’s fantastic. I wish we lived closer. That would be so fun.  So tell me about the type of thing the type of people that you help In your coaching practice, absolutely, thank you for asking. 

 

So I am a divorce coach. And I work specifically with men and women who are either in the early stages or middle stages of their divorce or beyond. And while I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, known as the LDS faith, while I am a member of that LDS faith and coach within that faith, I have a lot of clients that are of a different faith. And they want to keep God in the equation of their divorce. They want to lean into their spiritual practice, and into faith rather than fear as they’re moving through the divorce process. And so I think that’s one thing that really helps to separate me from maybe some other coaches that might be out there or even therapists that might be out there is I welcome and invite and support the idea of connecting with your divine source, that divine power, your inner wisdom, that that prompting that spirit, so that you can navigate the waters of divorce a little bit easier. Because it’s an awfully rocky path.

Yeah, that I’m, I’m so glad you said that. Because I am also divorced. But that was many years ago, and I did not have a strong faith at that time. And I can not I can, I cannot imagine how much. Maybe not even easier, but just more solid, that journey would have been or, you know, if I had had faith to lean on, because it was it was an awful experience. And I don’t know that it changes the pain of the experience. But I think it does help to go through it with that support.

Yes, yes. And it can increase the peace, you still have to do the hard work, you’re still going to have very challenging moments and very tearful moments, and a lot of heartbreak. But you know, knowing that you have a God that is watching over you and that you can talk to so freely and, and lean into those practices that bring your heart and your spirit comfort, it really can help to at least lighten the burden to some degree. So that’s one thing that I really value about my divorce experience as an individual woman. And I think it’s something really unique that I offer my clients as well.

 

Yeah, yeah, that’s so important to have that support. And, and to have that support, not only in divorce, but in your faith and in because not not all, not everybody supports, you know, people of faith. So, but to have, but to have somebody that is supporting both your faith and supporting the journey through divorce, I think is really important. Yes. So yeah. I’m just curious. Because I think when we met, you were just in the very beginning stages of your divorce. And I and I remember how rough that was for you, and, and how, how you struggled so much with everything that was going on between the money side, and you know, the kids and, you know, all of the aspects of divorce. But I’m, I want to, I want to ask, like, what did that journey back to you even look like?

That’s a really fantastic question. When you’re in that space of divorce, you feel like your world has been turned upside down and inside out, and nothing feels solid, right? I oftentimes compare it to being dropped in the middle of the ocean, and there’s no land in sight. It’s very scary, it feels very uncertain. And you start to question a lot of aspects about who you are. And am I a confident decision maker? Will I get through this successfully? You know, what kind of impact is going to be on the other side of this equation, not only for myself, but as you mentioned, my children, our housing, our finances, what kind of support will I be able to offer them as the single mom now? So I really leaned into two practices when it came to kind of coming back around and finding who I am and who I was during that space. I trusted first and foremost that everything was working for my greatest good and that’s probably a reflection of my real life. Just upbringing, right? But I truly do believe that even in the midst of hard, those things will come about that you need to have come about because it will serve your greatest good and, and that’s just a part of me it’s kind of a part of my DNA. I like to believe that. And then I also trusted that I only had to solve one thing at a time. And in solving one thing at a time and doing so confidently. And with clarity, I was nurturing my self esteem. I was nurturing my belief that I was smart. I was capable, that I could figure things out even even things that were very unfamiliar. And I was going to be okay. I will be okay.

Yeah, I love that. Yeah. I mean, that just goes to a whole other, like dimension of faith, faith in yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I have this sort of three part equation that I lean on. It’s trust God, trust myself, and trust the process.

And I like that. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. Yeah, I think. Because as long as you can do that, like you said, eventually, it it will reach, you know, the place where you’re supposed to be, and, and you will figure things out. And and I always say, you know, eventually is good enough.

Yeah, and we don’t have to have all the answers now. Exactly. That circles back to your belief of trust the process, right? Yeah. And there’s just no way for us to know what’s on the other side of the next step. So trusting the process kind of takes that burden away, kind of that, that responsibility into, Okay, God, it’s you and I, we’re going to partner, I’m going to do my job, I’m going to trust you to do your job. And I’m going to trust that you know, the equation it’s going to unfold as it’s supposed to.

Yeah, yeah. That’s why I love what you said about I only have to solve one thing at a time.

Yes, yes. Yeah, it really does nurture your sense of strength and your sense of self. And that’s, that’s a big part of the puzzle. When you’re coming back into finding who you are, again, in the midst of divorce.

Yeah, I’m strong. I’m smart, I’m capable. I like. Yeah, I have, I have a process that I teach my clients, that’s called Three, three ways to solve any problem and the problem, like you can put any problem in this in this formula, and you will get the solution that you’re looking for. I think a lot of times we’re we the problem that we’re trying to solve is not the real problem. You know, if we can, if we can identify the right problem or the real problem, then we can find the real solution. Yes. But I think a lot of times we’re trying to solve the wrong problem once one problem that I’ve tried to solve in the past is problem of how I feel. And one of my clients heard, I think she heard might have heard this on maybe one of our CO CEOs, podcast, emotions are not a problem to be solved.

And that is a truth. True fact. And yet, a lot of people fight with that. Yeah, they wrestle against that, don’t they?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Because if you’re trying to solve the problem of the emotion, then you’re, you’re chasing the wrong rabbit, so to speak, you’re not going to get to the destination you seek if you’re, if you’re, you know, going down the wrong path, and but the three ways to solve any problem or resources. So I mean, you know, with respect to, I mean, with respect to your situation, some of those problems needed to be solved by resources, they need to be solved by over resources, maybe they can be solved by financial resources or financial advice. Resources are short. Yeah. So there’s lots of different resources I was going through this process with when I was peer coaching somebody one day, and one of their resources was actually a decision. And once they were able to make that decision, that was a resource that solved their problem. And so there’s lots of different resources that we can call on or we can either create, redistribute, or wear that we already have at our disposal, that we can use that will solve the problem. So thinking not just in terms of tangible resources, energy is a resource, like how much energy are you putting towards this problem? Attention, focus, those are resources. So there’s lots of ways different ways to think about resources and how those resources can solve. Solve a problem. Another big one is mindset. Mindset is a huge one, that comes into play a lot. Because sometimes if we don’t have the resources, then, you know, we have to call on the mindset to do what we can with what we have. And if we’re too busy thinking about, well, I can’t because I don’t have access to this or that, you know, we were talking before we started recording this podcast about that, that scarcity mindset, and how that can limit what you can accomplish and the outcomes you can you can achieve when you have that limited or when you have that scarcity mindset, which is focused on what you don’t have versus what you do have. So how do you see that playing out for? How did you see it playing out in your situation or, or for some of your clients?

You know, I’m glad that you emphasize those two factors. And I’m really curious to know your third. So we can’t we can’t be done today without knowing that our circle back to that. So if I understand correctly, you were saying that, you know, we always have resources. And we always get to examine our mindset, is that correct? Or they’re in that’s two of the three pillars. Yep. So you know, it is really important to create a support team, you need resources available. And I’m not talking about family members and friends, I’m talking about qualified professional individuals who know that, that specific angle that you need support, and so for instance, a financial advisor, right, and that’s a resource. If you unless you’re a financial guru, and you have some training, you feel very, very confident in your financial skills. When it comes to community assets and debts, you need a financial advisor, you need a financial coach like you. Another resource is yes, the right legal representation. So knowing who to invite onto your team is huge. And in fact, I have a piece on my website that talks about building a support team and the key players that you need to have in your life. So absolutely reach out to those professionals and recognize where your knowledge is limited. And then with mindset, you you know what? It’s a game changer. If you’re going to look at everything as difficult and as an obstacle, then that’s exactly what you’re going to experience difficulty and stagnation. But if you can look at everything as an opportunity, and an invitation. Even in even in the midst of heart, if you can have that perspective of what can I learn from this? How can this serve me? How can I move forward through this and create the best possible outcome, then your mind is going to really just go to work for you in creating these resourceful solutions. And, and that’s really important to make sure that you are tapping into a higher level of thinking rather than nurturing the poor me story.

Yeah, yeah. So important. Yeah. So what was what was it? I mean, I hate to put you on the spot. But what was one of your limiting beliefs as you’re going through this journey?

Sure. That’s a really, really good question. One of my limiting beliefs was that, let’s see. There’s a handful. I’m like, which one? Do I want it to? Oh, you don’t have to pick just one.

One of my limiting beliefs was, you know, I’m not capable. I’m not capable. And I’m not capable of securing a rental home. There we go. Let’s talk on that. One. I’m not capable of securing a rental home. I don’t have a work history. I don’t have. I don’t have an established credit line on my own without being under this umbrella of a married couple. No one will want to rent to me. I’m gonna live under a bridge with my children. completely false, right. I mean, it’s a story. It’s a limiting belief that I struggled with. And I was like, Okay, I had to set aside the drama and really recognize, okay, single women find rentals all the time. There are people who want to rent their homes. There are people who recognize divorce puts men and women in hard circumstances and I will be able to find the rental that is just right for me. So Oh, kind of untangling that story and calling myself out on my own nonsense was really important. And I just started talking with everyone that I knew here we go back to resources, right? I started networking and getting the word out and tapping into my people, Hey, I’m looking for a rental house, hey, I’m looking for a rental house. And sure enough, the stars aligned. And I found this fantastic landlord who was like, I’m totally all in, I know that you’re a trustworthy person. I know that, you know, you’re a hardworking person. I understand the dynamics of divorce. And yes, I want you to rent my home.

That’s awesome. Yeah, so yeah, that’s such a good example of scarcity, limited thinking, because when you think I, you know, when you focus on what you don’t have, I don’t have a credit, a good credit history, because I, you know, not everything was in my name, or maybe sometimes nothing is in, in the woman’s name. And all of those things that you don’t have, and then being able is showing us that shift to all the things, you know, to focusing on the things that you do have. I do know, people, right, I have friends, I have family who might know somebody that wants to rent to me, you know, start starting to think about and brainstorm those resources that you do have, when you when you’re able to step out of that focus on what you don’t have. So that’s really, right. Right. And quite frankly, I had to get pretty creative pretty fast, because I don’t have any family in the state of Arizona, where I live. I zero, you know, my mother has passed my father, it lives in Idaho, and yet, my son, my last minor child, right, he’s going to be residing in the state of Arizona, I need to live in Arizona. And I want to enjoy my final few years of parenting this beautiful son of mine as much as possible. So creative problem solving became one of my strengths.

 

Yeah, yeah, that’s fantastic. So, so yeah, the third way to solve any problem is just through simple decision. So what I mean by that is, you can just decide that it’s not a problem.

I love that. I love that belief.

So I always list that one last, but it’s actually the first one I always go to. When I have a problem, that I want to solve these Yes, first identify the problem, you know, the real problem. And then I asked myself, Why is it a problem? Mm hmm. Because that could solve the problem right there if you are able to just decide that it’s not a problem. So, I mean, I always I always think of the example, you know, because sometimes we tried to solve for emotions, like, like I said before. And so sometimes, why is the answer to why is this a problem is, it’s because I feel uncomfortable, or I feel sad, or I feel upset, or I feel hurt, or I feel burdened, or I feel ashamed. And so if we can decide, well, maybe that’s not really a problem, then, then we just sit with that emotion, we process that emotion. And we go on to the next problem.

And you know, what’s really fascinating, Jill, is that returns all of our power and decision making capabilities, it turns it back over to us. Yes, we then are in the driver’s seat once again, right? Rather than being at the effect of something, we are making those decisions that are going to help to either, you know, create resolution or create insight or, or put us in touch with the right people. And or to let it go. Maybe it really just isn’t a problem. We let it go. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, yeah.

Yeah. And that it’s speaking to that point, you know, stepping into our own power is really important, because I remember when I was divorced, this was many years ago, but I’ve really struggled. And even though I didn’t have kids, I went from, you know, a role that Hi, I had filled for 10 years as wife and you know, I took care of all of the household stuff and to I felt like I was out in limbo, I love your analogy of, you know, just out in the middle of the ocean. I mean, so that is what it felt like. But it took me a really long time to find myself again. And so, you know, we were talking before about that journey back to you. Yes. And I think that can be really tough for some people. And even, even like, I see people who have jobs before they start their own business. And I coach coaches who are building their own business, and I see moms who maybe, you know, stayed at home with their children, building business, businesses. And so, I mean, that is a role shift, and in their role is shifting their identity. And so I think that is, that can be a struggle to, to step into that new role, because that new role always feels so uncertain and so uncomfortable. Because it’s something that we’re learning, it’s something that we’re growing into. And so we we were talking before about how to do that how to go on that journey. And, you know, one of the steps we talked about was just be 100%. You and honor, who you are, and sometimes it can take a little bit to figure that out. So you said you, you help your clients go on that journey, right?

Yes. And I love that you highlighted our job is just to be the best version of who we are, first and foremost. Because if we’re trying to be something different, or someone else, then we’re not serving anyone. Well, we’re not serving ourselves, well. We’re not serving our children. Well, we’re not serving our clients or our associates or friends. Well, right. So being really true to who you are, first and foremost, and owning that 100% owning it. And with no apology is so powerful. Because if you can own it with no apology, then you really do love who you are. Yeah, yeah. Yes, a lot of my clients, a lot of my divorcing clients come, they’re in this divorce space, they’re on the other side of it. They’re like, I don’t, I don’t even know who I am anymore. I don’t even know where I fit in the world anymore. Well, and of course, they don’t, you know, they lost themselves. Along the way, they lost their, their hopes, their dreams, their passions, their hobbies, their desires, along the way of a difficult relationship, and the demands of parenting and the demands of day to day life. And they’re dealing with their own unique struggles. So it’s not uncommon to feel like you really don’t know who you are anymore. But really coming back into alignment. And allowing yourself to explore that can be a beautiful journey, it can be scary as well. There’s a lot of beautiful byproducts that come through that. And first and foremost, you need to just open that awareness and allow for there to be some space in some room to be like, oh, you know what, I really don’t like being the mom that has all the kids at my house on Friday night watching movies and eating pizza. I really don’t care for that, even though it’s something that used to be part of my identity. It doesn’t serve me well now. And I value my piece, I value my quiet and so I will drive my daughter or son to the neighbor’s home, but I don’t want to host anymore. And letting that be okay. Right. So opening up to that and allowing yourself to explore without judgment, the big piece of the puzzle.

Yeah. Yeah. And I think I, I’ve seen this happen, too, when people are building a business when the business becomes their life purpose. And so I would encourage people to just take, you know, put time on your calendar to really check in with yourself from time to time. Making sure that I mean, because we can we can people please or we can ignore our needs, our values our wants, we can abandon ourselves, to people or to things. Yes, our business and so I find a lot of people they get in that, you know, when you’re first building a business, it’s really easy to get caught up in oh, I’ll just, you know, do all this hustle in the beginning and this is not going to last forever. I’m just going to do it in the beginning. Before you know it. It’s like, Why was I doing this business again? Because now I like totally hate it. And I’ve seen you know, I’ve seen that happen to me business owners and coaches where, you know, they go into it for all the right reasons. But then they lose themselves, or they lose their way along the way. And it becomes almost like this, this burden to them, where it was life giving now it’s like life draining. And so that’s when you really need to check in with yourself and see, you know, where you are, in your mindset that created that situation? And what is the problem that you now need to solve? And, and how can we solve that.

And being willing to do that inventory, that introspective check, is, it’s so important, right? Because we do change with time, our our needs change with time, our desires change with time, our identity, hopefully is changing with time. If I if I’m still the same way that I was 10 years ago, then I don’t think that’s a really great thing. Because you know, then I haven’t encountered enough challenges and opportunities and rewards, to help myself evolve. We want to be evolving. And so yeah, to lose ourselves in the process, whether it’s, you know, working too much, and I always identifying as this successful business builder, or over investing in the children always identifying as this rockstar, Mom, you know, we we can’t lose ourselves in the process. And it happens a lot. Yeah.

Yeah, you really have to do this, like periodic inventory. I like the way you use the inventory, to recommit to you to really understand who am I today? Who do I want to be? And recommit to you. I think that’s such a good part of the process.

Can I tell you a little funny story here? I love it. Yeah. Okay. So in being this single woman, and wanting to try new things, and discover new interests, I’ve always believed that refinishing furniture would be just like really therapeutic. I thought, you know, and turning the music on, I’m getting my hands involved the sofa to sand this down and refinish it and have a beautiful, fresh look to an old piece. Oh, my goodness, Jill, I couldn’t be further from the truth. I hate refinishing furniture. It’s miserable.

 

Which, which part? Did you hate the most? All of it. I went on that I went on that little bit for a little while to this like, Yeah, it sounds amazing, doesn’t it? Oh my gosh, this will be so much fun.

Well, in on Pinterest, and on YouTube. It looks like it’s gonna be a breeze. And here, I thought it’s gonna everybody. No, it’s not. I thought it was gonna be a new part of my identity and kind of this whole therapy outlet, right, like, creative outlet for me. And wow. While I finished what I started, because that was important to me to finish what I started, it was a huge learning. It was a huge learning of okay, you tried this? You learned it’s really not your cup of tea. And a plus for effort. You don’t need to do this again.

Yeah, but that’s a good point, too. Because if you don’t try, you don’t know. And so that’s the other thing I see is people, women especially, I think it’s more so women than than men. But I think women have such a fear of doing it wrong and getting it wrong and looking foolish and wasting time or like all of these stories that we believe that we’re afraid to try things. And I mean, I’ll raise my hand, I know that I was like this, especially in the first couple of years of my business. I was like, No, I’m not going to do that. Because I don’t know if it’ll work. But you have to try it. Because that’s the only way to know if it will work.

And it’s so rewarding. When we do figure out what works and we find a new strength, we find capability. We add a little bit more credit into our self esteem account.  Right? Yeah, yeah.

So good morning. So yeah, because even if you don’t get the outcome you saw in the beginning, you still come out of it more capable. So whether you win or lose, you are still more capable on the other side, and you still in capability creates confidence.

 

Yes, 100%. I agree. I agree. Yeah. I sold a car this year for the first time in my life by myself. And I purchased a car this time this year, for the first time by myself. And it was an amazing growth opportunity. Did I do it all I don’t know, who dictates what right looks like. Yeah. But did I do it? 100%? Myself? Yes. And I even had a friend, a gentleman friend who is very kind and helpful in my life. And he’s like, Hey, do you want me to help you through this process? And you know, he was just trying to extend a courtesy. And I was like, No, I don’t. This is another thing. I’m adding to my resume of my strengths and my capabilities. And Jill, it was amazing.

I love that. I love that. Yeah. Because how do you get stronger? You? You lift those weights, right?

We show up, we show up for the task.

Yeah, you do that you do that thing? Yeah.

Yeah. It’s been a wonderful journey, rediscovering who I am inviting my clients to experiment with who they believe they are, who they want to be who they no longer want to be. Yeah. Hiding process. I love it.

That’s such an important part of the equation who we no longer want to be.

 

For sure. I have. Yes, yeah. Yeah.

Because I think sometimes we hold on to those things just out of whether it’s out of habit, or whether it’s out of fear, or whether it’s just out of not knowing that we don’t have to be that way.

And societal pressure, right? Yeah. Yeah. Terrain? Yeah. family expectations, community expectations, church organization expectation, work expectations, you know? Yeah, recognizing who you no longer want to be on within those frameworks. Yeah, framework of your life.

Yeah, that makes me think of, I’ve got my retreat, I’m going to start selling in a couple of weeks from now, I don’t, I don’t know when this podcast is gonna be episode’s gonna be released. But and it’s about selling without rules. So I guess we can take an extend that same concept, you know, because selling without rules is making your selling process. You know, customized for you. And you can do that same thing, you know, living without rules. And you can look at that, like, not, not without laws. But without, we input we, we have so many self imposed rules, right? I can’t be this way, or I can’t do this thing. I can’t refinish furniture or, you know, whatever our interests are, we have so many self imposed rules. So it’s almost like living without rules, divorcing without rules, you know, anything, we do relationships, without rules, we can create our own set of rules and our own set of boundaries, based on who we are based on who we want to be based on who we don’t want to be.

I’m glad you brought that up. Because, you know, when it comes to the divorce space, a lot of times partners usually will find that one will acquiesce to the other more often, right? One will yield are given or compromised more quickly. And one thing that I’ve taught my clients to do is when they feel like they’re slipping back into that pattern, and that experience, I remind them all you ever have to say is, I’m sorry, that doesn’t work for me. Period. Yeah, I’m sorry, that doesn’t work for me. No, you can’t bring the children to the home late. Our agreed upon time is six o’clock. That’s not going to work for me. Or no, you’re not welcome to come to the door. We’re no longer a couple. You know, this is my space. That does not work for me. And really allowing that to be a complete sentence. All you need to say it doesn’t have to be it doesn’t even have to be a fight. Yeah. And have to be difficult. So just a fact. It’s just a fact. Yeah. And it helps to reset those rules.

Yeah. That’s so good. Yeah, that’s all part of taking back

your power. Yes. Sure. For sure. Yeah. The power was just in hibernation.

Right, and wake it up.  Anytime.  I know. And I was listening to one of your previous podcasts where you were talking about, you know, Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz and how, how, you know, we think that it’s beyond us. It’s always within us. Yeah, tap into it and trust that we’re capable and strong.

Yeah, I think that’s one aspect that we share as coaches we’re very, very, the approach we take with our clients is similar in that everything like most of the resources that you have access to are already within you. Yeah, and the knowledge that you need the intuition, the everything, so much of it is already within us. We just have to tap into it. And I think that’s what you know, some of the best coaches do is they help you tap into what you already have extra, you know, already, what do you already have available to you that maybe you’re just not using? Or you’re not even aware of that you have access to?

I agree. Yeah, I agree. And that takes our confidence and our self esteem and the level of self trust, to a whole new level. Yeah. Yeah, it does.

This has been a blast. I have enjoyed chatting with you. And is there anything else that you want to share?

You know, I always welcome conversations around divorce, I know and, uh, you know, as well, being a divorcee, I know, the reality of many of those fears and insecurities that can, can dominate our minds when we’re thinking through this process. So I always really do welcome a conversation. Because first and foremost, I want to be of service and let people know you are not alone. And you are going to make it to the other side. So you know, for anyone that wants to reach out and have a conversation, I’d welcome the opportunity to spend time with them. And they can meet, they can reach me through my LDS divorce.com, which is my website. But you know what, there’s just so much goodness to be had. And we need to step into owning our beautiful, rich, vibrant, exciting lives. And it’s so much more fun to live that way.

Yeah, yeah, that’s good. Yeah. And I’ll put that in the show notes, my LDS divorce.com. And then I’ll put your Instagram handle in there as well. Yeah. Well, thanks so much for being on my Easy Money Podcast.

I appreciate it. Thank you. And I encourage everybody who wants divorce to be easier just to check out your website and and connect with you and have that conversation.

Thank you, Jill.  It’s a pleasure. Thanks. Thanks, Samantha. 

Wow, that was such a fun conversation. So packed with just little tidbits and such nuggets of goodness, I’ve really enjoyed that conversation. I hope you did, too. But I just wanted to talk about some of the things that I took away with that, from that conversation. Just in case you missed any of this, you can go back and check out the parts that we talked about. But what I found really interesting is how Samantha talked about her personal journey back to who she is, I think that’s so important to recognize, you know, the journey back from a difficult time. There are a number of things in our lives, that can be very challenging, and divorce is definitely one of them. I have gone through divorce myself, as you probably have heard me talk about from time to time, and any type of losses difficult. Last week, you heard from Tricia Zody, who coming back to herself, her journey after the loss of her husband. And so there are times as entrepreneurs that we deal with loss, that we deal with failure that we deal with financial loss, not feeling supported on our entrepreneurial journey, any number of difficulties that we deal with as entrepreneurs.

And so the things that Samantha talked about in her journey, I think can be helpful during any type of difficulty that we might face. And so we had a conversation about, you know, how she felt as she was going through that journey. And she used this analogy of being out in the middle of the ocean, with new no land in sight. She said nothing feels solid. And I could definitely relate to that. Who are we in these situations? How do we show up in the face of challenges? And I think a lot of that depends on how we see ourselves, who we think we are, what we believe about ourselves how much faith we have in ourselves. And it does also depend on the tools that we have in our arsenal. And one of the tools that she mentioned was faith, another tool. I mean, that is very important to me, but not only faith in a higher power, you know, something bigger than yourself. But I think faith in yourself is is equally as important. And another tool that she talked about was someone to support you now she talked about and I’ll get I’ll come back to this in a minute. Because I want to expand on a little bit, she talks about having a good team around you. And like I said, I’ll come back to that in a minute. And she also talked about only solving one problem at a time. Tackling one thing at a time, makes you feel more competent, more confident, more capable. And I shared my tripod that I lean on quite frequently for support, it’s believing and in myself and trusting myself. So Trust yourself, trust God, trust the process. And when you can believe she talked about I’m strong, I’m smart, I’m capable, I can figure it out. So when you believe I’m strong, I’m smart, I’m capable, you can figure anything out eventually, right? Sometimes it takes a little bit. And you just have to keep coming back to that faith in yourself faith in God faith in the process. And you will figure it out eventually, and eventually, is soon enough. I think sometimes when we’re in the pain of our situation, when we’re in that difficulty, we can be in a real hurry to get out of that pain. But I think sometimes just being in that pain, and the lessons that that difficult time has to teach us, you know, we shouldn’t be in a hurry. Because whatever we’re there for, we want to be sure and learn so that we don’t have to come back to that lesson. So just remember, eventually, we can figure out anything eventually and eventually is soon enough. Because whatever you have to learn is going to serve you in the future. So it pays to not be in a hurry to get out of that. 

Now, I also mentioned my three ways to solve any problem. And you can still get that free resource of mine three ways to solve any problem you by going to https://jillwrightcoaching.com/solve-any-problem. And if you have any trouble finding that just reach out to me, DM me on Instagram, email me, Jill@jillwrightcoaching.com. And I’ll get it over to you. But those three ways are resources, mindset and decisions. And so there can be a lot of different ways to look at resources. And just remembering like, even just asking the simple question, what is a resource that can help me in this problem? What is a mindset shift that can help me in this problem? What is a decision I can make? That will help me with this problem? So resources, mindset decisions, those are the three ways to solve any problem. And Samantha talked about the importance of having the right people on your team. So I said, I would come back to this, because I wanted to expand on this a little bit. Because sometimes in our business, we can feel quite isolated, quite alone in our business, and we don’t have all the answers. And I think, you know, we can beat ourselves up for not having the answers or we can just accept, you will not always have all the answers. And that’s okay. Because you can have someone on your team, you can have someone in your network, you can have someone at church, you can have a friend, you can have a fellow coach, somebody that you were in a group or mastermind with, you know, or somebody on your team that has the answer. And you can ask for help. This is something that I’ve struggled with. Most of my life is asking for help, but I’m getting better at it. But having someone on your team that has the answers as an entrepreneur who is on your team, who is there for legal questions, or legal advice, who’s there for accounting questions or tax questions, tax advice? Is there a tax advisor or planner? Do you have an accounting professional, a financial professional, a financial advisor or financial planner, who is going to advise you on what to do with your money when you make all that money in your business, right? So web design and support branding, design someone to support you for tasks that you want to take off your plate because, you know, like a VA or an online business manager, because you want there are times when you’re going to want to take things off your plate in order to clear space for the things that you want to do and that you do well and that contribute to your business success. So do you want to spend X number of hours posting on social media? If what really drives the revenue in your business? You is you being a really good networker and building relationships with people? Does the do the things that you’re taking? That you’re doing, that you’re spending time on take away from the things that you could be doing to grow your business? So that’s what I mean, when I say, you know, having the right people on your team having the right people in your network, you don’t have to have all the answers. Because all you have to do is nobody know somebody that does have the answer that you’re missing. So get the right help for the problems that you need to solve. I think that was a pretty big takeaway for us business owners out of this conversation, but all the takeaways, so many takeaways, I just absolutely loved this conversation with Samantha and I hope you enjoyed it. If you want support in your divorce journey, reach out to Samantha on Instagram at my LDS divorce. And I’ll see you next week on easy money. I love what you heard today. There’s more where that came from. Just head on over to https://jillwrightcoaching.com/ and get your free and Simple Financial Freedom Guide. Stop worrying about money. Stop trying to manage your time. Instead create ease and freedom in your business. It’s the first step to making money easier. And don’t forget to subscribe so you don’t miss next week’s episode. See you then.