CONNECT the DOTS
CONNECT the DOTS
Show Notes
There were so many great nuggets in this month’s theme of Freedom that I wanted to highlight a few of them and add my own insights for you to consider and process.
Tune in for some really interesting takes on Freedom from my October podcast guests!
Be sure to listen to the podcast in November when I’ll be recapping my lessons learned from hosting a live in person retreat and what’s next for Jill Wright Coaching!
In the meantime, you don’t have to miss the next ELEVATE Retreat — get all the Details as they unfold — go to ELEVATE Retreat 2022!
Listen to the show
Description:
Well, you know what that means it’s time to expose the money lies. Let’s get started over has been my favorite series that I’ve done since I started doing this podcast. And the topic of freedom is so near and dear to me, because so many of my clients and so many coaches out there, so many entrepreneurs feel so stuck a lot of the time and feel so trapped in their circumstances in in their brain, that, you know, freedom is very important to me. And freedom is key freedom is critical to be able to move forward powerfully in your business to step into the powerful entrepreneur, the powerful coach that you are. And so this month, talking about freedom has been so much fun for me. And being able to relate that to so many different areas of our life in our business has been so much fun for me. So I couldn’t quite let this go. And so it worked out perfectly that October has five Fridays in it so that I get to do one more episode about freedom. And so what I wanted to do in this episode is pull a few highlights from each of those amazing episodes that I did in October with these amazing women that were my guests on my podcast that I had conversations with, and pull out some of the really great nuggets, some of the really great highlights, and remind you of them and also pull out some of the halls that I didn’t get a chance to talk about on those episodes, and pull those out for you now. So here they are, here are the highlights from those amazing four podcasts from those amazing four women. And my commentary on each one of those. So enjoy so much.
And sometimes I’m super irreverent and hilarious. And other times I regret instantly the things that come out of my mouth. And sometimes I’m really generous and timed. But if I haven’t slept well, I’m really grumpy. And I have a mean streak like, I’m all those things pending on the moment. Right? That’s fabulous. Oh, I’d love that. Because I think one of the misconceptions that people have when they’re starting a business, especially starting their first business, which is a lot of my clients is that they have to be like this certain persona, in order to be successful in business. And I love that you’re telling us who you really are. Because I feel like who you really are, makes you successful. Not all of that fake crap. Oh, I love that. And I think to just sort of the work you and I do and you’re you know, you have a lot of budding entrepreneurs or people who have fighting off the money lies and some, you know, history that they got from wherever. But I think too, like we fall in love with this idea of like the future version of ourselves. So when my business is successful, when I have X amount in the bank, when I’ve paid off this amount of debt, then I will be this magical perfect person. And we like we forget, like we’re still human. So even that future version of ourselves, like still gonna get grumpy and still going to say things that they’re going to regret and still wake up like a wild child and birds are not going to bring them close on the string. And you know, bluebirds are not going to help them get dressed in the morning. Like, that doesn’t happen, just because some of our goals are met. I think it’s the expectation that just sets us up for so much disappointment when we arrive at wherever it is we’re trying so hard to arrive at. Yeah, it’s so much judgment along the way. And so much. I mean, and so much of that. stuff gets us so stuck along that journey, that then we just pile on the evidence that my gosh, see, it’s not gonna work because this is who I am. Yeah. Yeah. And I think like, we just smell the money lie. I feel like it has to be perfect that we have to evolve to perfection and that is not the journey. That is a complete lie. Yeah. So one of the and the reason I wanted to talk to you well. Besides the fact that I just adore you. So a little bit of fan girl here, apologize, ditto right back at you, lady, no worries. So one of the reasons I wanted to talk to you is because people I think, don’t see all of the places that money lies truly come up. And so your specialty is, you know, your, the style Guru, the style master the style diva, I don’t know what you bas like to be called all of those, that’s okay. And, you know, for my clients, that is an area probably of scarcity. And so I feel like they do have a lot of money lies that they probably aren’t even thinking about the impact of when it comes to style, and so they’re just kind of winging it. And I know that you have a lot of experience in dealing with this with entrepreneurs. So I just want to kind of give you the floor for a minute. And so you can kind of talk us through what that what the impact really is, you know, what is missing for people when it comes to style? And how does that impact them in their business? How does it impact how they show up even in their life? In their relationships? Like everywhere? That they are? How does how does that impact? Yeah, okay, so it’s so I think this is like, oh, man, so I like you invited me to soapbox. I got all excited. Um, so really one of the first things I see right, and I think you probably see this too, is it’s like never about the money. It’s never about the clothes. It’s all the janky ass mindset that you have, and you have it in this one area. So chances are 99% chance that it’s gonna show up elsewhere. So for me, I think the perfect conduit to figure out what’s going on with this human in front of me, it’s like, what’s going on in your underwear drawer? What’s going on in your closet? Like, how are you dressing yourself or not getting dressed? How are you showering or choosing not to shower? Like, what are your thoughts about purchasing new clothes like perfect opportunity to figure out like sort of what’s beneath the surface just like for you, right? Like, when you talk to them about money, then you get all this story in that history from them about what’s going on with them. So I think we’re in a unique position that we get to talk about this one thing as a conduit to like this person’s heart and mind and what’s happening with them. So for me what happens a lot, and I have multiple consults yesterday, so it was kind of like, I wish I had all these women in the same room. So they know they’re not crazy, like really, really. But oftentimes, it’s sort of a different, it’s a nuances but similar thing. So when I hear a lot is, you know, well, it’s not that bad. So it’s not that bad. I don’t have to replace it yet. I’m going to wait for it to get real, real bad before I go replace it. I’m going to wait for my bra, you know, the underwear to pop up and poke me in the face before I decide, okay, probably it’s time for new bra, I’m going to wait for this happened to a client, I’m going to wait for I’m an important meeting and I pull up my underwear and I’m just going to poke a giant hole right through them. And I had to spend the rest of the meeting with my belly hanging out of my elastic in my undies. Because I wanted to wait till I got real real bad, right? And like that line of thinking it’s such a lie. Like, How bad are we gonna let it get before we decide to replace something? repair something? We do this everywhere in our lives? Yeah, like, How bad are we going to let the pipes in our house get or the roof get? You know, before we decide to do something? How bad are we gonna let our debt or credit card debt before we decide to do something about it. So it’s, you know, it’s a kind of sneaky lie that comes in, it was close. It’s kind of funny because they’re so easily replaced. But extrapolate out to something bigger. And this is a is kind of a bigger problem and you’re thinking that’s really not going to serve you. You know, a lot of times I hear well, I only wore it once. I didn’t wear it enough times. It’s like well, it doesn’t fit you name. You didn’t actually let you don’t like it. So they’re not allowed to replace an item and we’ll say wear it X number of times. Okay? But like if we do that everywhere in our life, I tried to sing it didn’t work out for me, but because I didn’t try it enough. I’m gonna work on it and expend all this energy when truly I just really don’t like it. Well, how about we just admit you don’t like it, and you’re not required to do anything else? Yeah, like we could we could just decide. Yeah, it’s almost like they don’t want to admit that they made a mistake because then they’re going to judge themselves or beat themselves up and you know, talk nasty to themselves like we all know that we do or have done at some point in time. Oh, they just keep it. Yeah, keep something that doesn’t work for them. I mean, too tight shoes is a perfect example of this, right? So I have clients always beautiful shoes and wear them once and they hurt. They, like they’re horrible. They’re like, well, you know, I should get a few more wears out of them. Why? Why? Like, what? No, like, you wouldn’t let your best friend come and like hammer at your feet. Like, we wouldn’t do this. We treat our shoes like, oh, you know, this precious thing. I have to wear them more times? No, no, you you really don’t, not required. But I think you’re onto something right? Like, then if I get rid of them too soon, I’m going to beat myself up for being wasteful. Now I’m going to beat myself up for you know, being vain. I’m going to beat myself up for not being Oh, I hear I hear this all the time. Not being a good steward of my money. Yeah, put Christian twist on I’m not gonna I’m not a good steward. And it’s like, well, I don’t know that stewardship requires you to wear clothes that don’t fit you all the time. Like, I don’t think proverbs work that into the definition, I think you’re okay. But that comes up, right? These are the things that come up. And then we start to do this everywhere in our lives, we start to do this in our businesses in particular, we know something’s broken, we know, this software we’re using really doesn’t meet the needs of our business, we know that this app we’re using really falls short, because the free version has all these limitations. It’s like no, no, I’ll live by instead of getting the pro version of this app I’m going to buy for, you know not buy, I’m going to get four other free apps to meet the needs that I just turned on the pro version would be just fine. I’m gonna I’m gonna sort of limp by. Because I’m not willing to make the investment because it’s not being a good, quote unquote, Steward. So, you know, this sort of shows up everywhere, how we do things, how we do everything? Yeah. Yeah, it’s interesting. Just all of that comes out. Oh, it’s not that bad. Kind of, it’s like, you know, sweeping, five pounds of dirt under the rug over the course of that’s like, yeah, this little bit of dirt is not that bad, but a year’s worth of that dirt. It’s pretty bad. It’s pretty bad. And we can we can pretend it’s not, you know, a now elephant sized dust ball, we could totally pretend, I don’t know, that’s gonna work very long as we start to trip over it and run into it. But sure, we could pretend but let me know when you’re ready. Right? That was such a good one. Because I do I see this all the time. women that are afraid of wasting women that are afraid of not being a good steward with their money, not being able to invest in themselves or in the tools that they need for their business. So they do they try to scrape together these different things. And yeah, you may not spend money, you may not waste money. But you’re what you’re wasting, or what you’re spending are the opportunities that you could be taking advantage of relationships that you could build or connections that you can capitalize on, to build your business, while you’re trying to cobble together all these different solutions in so that you don’t have to spend money on the pro version or on an app that will work really well for what you need, then you instead of wasting money, you waste energy, time, attention, even frustration, the different things that you get caught up in trying to make this thing work in order not to spend money. And instead, you waste the opportunities that you have to spend time doing what you love and doing what will make you successful. So I want you to maintain awareness around when you try to do these things. And instead of asking yourself, or thinking of it in terms of what you’ll save, think of it in terms of what it will cost you. So when you’re trying to make a financial decision when you’re trying to make an investment decision in your business, I want you to think about what will this saves me what time energy attention focus? Relationships, what will they save me and what will this cost me? So look at it from both angles when you make those decisions, because I think you’ll be surprised at how much it really is costing you. That may not be money, but it is other resources that you have in your life and in your business. You know, getting frustrated and getting pissed off because something’s not working right could cost you something in your relationships, it could cost you more time with your family, it could cost you more connection time with friends in doing things in your community that you value. So it’s the cost can be more than just about money. So that’s what I challenge you to look for whenever you’re making decisions about what you’re going to invest in, in your business, how you’re going to invest in that. The timing of that. Look at the cost and the savings.
Hey, Sandra is so great to have you on the podcast today. Welcome. Thank you Jill. That’s always nice to chat with a friend. Yeah, it’s so much fun because I met Sandra, when we were working together in Kim Job’s coaching Kim, I should say, shouldn’t leave out Scott, the coaching pods. And so that’s where I met her and she has so much fun. I did a cooking class with her. And she is super engaging, super dynamic. And I love how much she makes cooking in the kitchen feel. Thank you. Yeah, it’s all totally true. So Sandra, I just want to to give my audience a sense of who you are. So I’ve already done a formal introduction of you. So I really want you to talk about who are you really, as a person? You know, what is the most important things we should know about you? As? Sandra Clark Jergensen. Well, thank you. Okay, so, more than anything, I am a curious bird of a home cook. Yes, I a cooking teacher. And I have a background in cooking and writing. But more than anything, I’m always up for like, what will happen what’s possible, and having a really good time in the kitchen, because the place to explore and I want that sort of freedom available to everyone that I cook with. So some people learning to cook feels stuffy or formal. Never that way with me, because I’m not any of those things. So you just bring your whole personality to the kitchen with you. Yes, it’s definitely a full self activity of what excites and delights me and helping other people feel that to have possibilities and fun. Yeah, yeah. And that’s exactly what I experienced in the class that I took from you. It was just because I felt kinda, I mean, I even took some culinary classes. And so I became equipped it this was several years ago. And so you know, use it or lose it, that whole thing. But, um, you know, coming in to that I kind of felt nervous, and you just put me right at ease. Oh, I’m so glad. So how did you do that? Because I feel like you know, the secret of what’s missing for people what makes them nervous in the kitchen, because you were able to dial in that for all of us that attended so quickly and easily. Yeah, I think people spend a lot of time in their head. And I’m the first person to admit that I’m there too, when it comes to a lot of issues, but in the kitchen, people do that, too. They’re like, Ah, I don’t have paprika. I am like my pan is not the exact time that is being demonstrated in this recipe, or I am out of time, or whatever it is. And they feel like I just can’t do this, I give up. And I’m just like, actually, that’s where you begin. Because everything is possible. It’s just making a few tweaks and adjustments to make it your own. So maybe you’re not doing dairy right now. Or maybe your kids allergic to nuts, and the only 9×13 pan in the house just like bottomed out yesterday, you’re gonna be fine. There’s so many workarounds and recognizing that if you decide it’s going to work out, everything is going to be fine and you’re just working from a different place and recipes. That’s just a formula. Instead of like an ultimatum it must be drawn this way. Why else? Why else are there 17 million recipes for like a pan of brownies. There isn’t one way to do it. People are making these things with black beans. People are making these things with like all butter and like cocoa powder. Some people are making them with whatever. The point is just like there’s so many ways to get to done. It’s an experiment I love that. Yeah. And so it’s interesting to kind of look at this and tie it back to business because, you know, coaches that are building a business, which is who I, coach and who I help, they are so in their heads about, oh, I need to do this right, I need to follow the formula. And it’s so easy to forget that it’s all an experiment, because we’re all doing what we need to do for the business we want for, like, as you said, for the brownie brownie recipe we want you know, if, if we’re not doing dairy, then why are we going to make brownies with dairy in them? Right? If that’s not our formula, then that’s okay. What are some of the stories that they come with? Sure, a lot of people come with the story of I should be doing it this way. Or it’s hard, or it’s complicated. I’m just thinking of clients I’ve worked with who they want to do things differently than they were raised for themselves or for their kids, or whatever it is. And they’re just like, the process of getting from A to be feels really, really complicated and super heavy, especially when you have a cultural tradition, or a social norm that is different than what you want to do. If you are coming out of like, meat and potatoes being raised with, like on food like that. And you’re like, I want to eat more colorfully, but like you look at that bunch of kale at the store, and you’re just like, I don’t know what to do with you. You look scary. And you get in your head. And it makes it so much harder than the actual process of, you know, cooking with the kale. Let’s take a couple of examples. So sure. So if I if if somebody is trying to cook cook from scratch, if they’re trying to be, say gluten free? That seems like a tough to me, that seems like a tough one, because I haven’t ever done that before. So if I suddenly am and trying to cook for someone who is gluten free, what are the things that I’m going I’m in? What are some of the things I need to think about? Or how do I think about that in a way that it’s not super scary, or it doesn’t feel limiting? First of all, it’s a lot harder to learn how to make biscuits, gluten free than it is to just make a rice dish that is naturally gluten free. So start yourself off easy. And yes, you can make phenomenal gluten free biscuits. I do it. But doesn’t mean you have to like jump off the deep end. That feels approachable. I like that. Yeah. So break it down. Like what can you do? Yeah, because that’s the same thing that I tell a lot of my clients they like, but I can’t. And so the first thing I ask them is what can you do? So I’d like that, because that’s kind of the approach that it sounds like. Yeah, don’t start with the hardest thing that you can imagine. Start with what feels easy. Yes. I mean, that makes it like so much more accessible. Because I’ve worked with people at a variety of levels, where some folks are brand new cooks and other folks, you know, quite experienced that they have a few things they would like to learn. And so the point is I teach and not everyone knows this, I teach the exact same recipes no matter who I hang out with, that I’ve written. And it’s just making them accessible at different levels, because some people are going to go to the farmers market and buy that lovely head of butter lettuce and go home and wash it and use that. And for some people just buying that bag of lettuce at the grocery store is a new experience. Start there. Or maybe you’re using food stamps, or whatever it is, and you’re gonna buy what works for that. Everyone’s got where they are. And starting right there is the perfect place to start because that’s where you are. You sound just like a coach. Food. Yeah, yeah. You’re a food kitchen cooking coach. Yeah, yeah. So I mean, it does sound like a very similar approach that we take in coaching. And I mean, we just we just meet our clients where we are and that’s exactly what you’re doing. And you make it so much fun. I mean, I know I’ve said that like three times, but I know I don’t think of myself as fun so I love to hang out with people who are you’re very fun for fun. Yes. So, and it sounds like another thing that I find with Michael clients is that they don’t trust themselves with their business decisions or their decisions about money. And I know that I’ve heard you talk before about the same same kind of concept in the kitchen, you have to really learn to trust yourself to tell me tell me a little bit about that. Oh, that one hits me like so deep. Because I remember being there and non trusting myself with whether it was like money decisions in starting my own business, or maybe being a very young cook. And for the first time where I would start edging out from basic recipes, and I would start to pick them apart saying, I don’t know if this will come out, and then just doing it any way. And so I want people to recognize that the best authority or what is delicious, and what will work in your kitchen is actually you. It is not the, like recipe developer or the cookbook author, it is not the blogger on the internet, because the blogger on the internet doesn’t know that you hate nutmeg.
And the blogger on the internet doesn’t know that your oven like is always hot on this particular burner. And the blogger on the internet just doesn’t know, you and the way that you like your food salted. And the fact that you know you have a lemon tree outside, and everything tastes better to you with a little bit of lemon. Oh, yeah, that that’s so good. Because same thing, you know, it goes back to our business. You know, because nobody is going to build a business the way that you’re going to build your business. Because you know what you want your business to look like? And nobody else has that vision, except for you. except to the extent that you shared it with your team or with the people that you’re working closely with. So, yeah, can I give you a quick example that makes my heart explode? Last night, I was teaching my teen cooking club, I’ve got a group of teenagers and tweens who would come together on Tuesday nights, and do a cocoa long dinner class where they make dinner for their family, whatever. We’re making rice pudding last night, as the finish for the meal and the kids are starting to ask all these questions will could I do this? Is this okay? I really like these flavors. I’m not sure about what we’re doing. And I’m just like, I am so delighted that you were asking all of these questions because you’re asking these questions because you are aware that you want something you are aware of what you like, the only thing is now to try it and to like own that you are the best person to decide what’s good for you. And as laughing as the kids are coming up with all these suggestions and possibilities to make the rice pudding theirs. I was like, well, would it work with Carmel? If I liked Carmel I’m like, do you like Carmel? Do you like rice pudding and Carmel flavors together? The best way to know is get out a spoon and try that one sister? And to watch them like, oh yeah, I do know what I like. And just to kind of own that in a way that like, I am free to create anything within the rice pudding universe was so fun. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, the three takeaways I have from that is know what you want. Know, be willing to experiment to get it and be wrong. Okay, and be willing to be wrong. Yeah. So just do it is basically what you’re saying. Just Sure, there’s some fundamentals that will make it easier to be successful. But at the end of the day, you are the best person. Love that so much.
Sure, there are some fundamentals that will make you more successful, but at the end of the day, you are the right person. And the other thing I took away from that starting where you are is the perfect place to start when you try to start where someone else is, or when you try to start where you think you should be. That’s when you make it harder on yourself because you’re judging where you are, you’re not accepting yourself you’re not moving forward from acceptance but moving in resistance, resistance and judgment always makes everything harder. So when you think you should be somewhere else when you’re trying to do it the right way instead of your way. It is always harder it takes so much more energy. Just accept where you are just start where you are. Just experiment. You know if you like caramel and you like rice pudding, then make rice pudding with caramel. Just experiment just keep going finding what lights you up just being 100% you. That’s where you’ll find the gold in your business. That’s how you will be successful. Just get out of spoon and try it sister, love that part. You are free to create anything in your business and you are free to create anything in your business in whatever way excites you. So just go do it and have fun doing it and just be yourself. Because one thing I know about my clients is who they are is already amazing. You don’t have to change who you are. And you don’t have to do things a certain way. There is no right way. There’s only your way.
I guess the first limiting belief is thinking that you’re not at the level yet that you needed me a that’s like the first piece to step over it. Because you always second guess yourself, you’re like, Oh, well, if I can do these things, why am I going to have someone else do these things. And so I think that’s the first limiting belief is really getting over that, that you need that support system in your business to get to the next level. Otherwise, you’re going to kind of stay stuck at that beginning level, and you can’t grow. So if you continue to do the things that you can do, just because you can do them, then you’re not going to give yourself the freedom to do the things you are best at. Which is exactly what will help you grow. Is that what I’m hearing you say? Yes, that is exactly right. Because I mean, we all have the same number of hours in the day. And where are you focusing that time? Is it in that zone that you are most efficient and your best self that that you’re really serving your clients the best at, or you spending half of your day trying to do all this backend work, that’s not even moving the needle needle forward in the sense of making an impact with your clients. It’s just stuff that has to be done to get to that point. And yeah, it definitely it gives you that freedom to open up more space. And in a sense, even though it does, it is an investment. And I won’t say it’s a cost. It’s an investment whenever you work with a VA, and so it is an investment. But that investment does give you an ROI. As far as is helping you get you to where you have more space, you’re enjoying the things that you’re doing. And you are working with where you could work with more clients even because you have more space to bring on those clients, or connect with them. Because all those pieces kind of flow together. And yeah, definitely.
Getting past that first step is is hard to think about because it is an investment. But whenever you can can compare it with what your return of your investment is, then yeah, it pays off. Yeah. And I can definitely see where, you know, I, I thank myself all the time for making that decision to, you know, just jump in and hire you. Because it has an I didn’t even realize truth. Truth be told, I didn’t even recognize it, because it’s easier to see when you’re in pain than when you’re absent of pain. And so I didn’t realize the pain that I was absent from until I’ve really intentionally thought about, okay, yeah, what would it be like? What would my business be like today, if I hadn’t hired Lynda, to do all of the stuff that she’s done for me from, you know, creating my, my landing pages, my sales pages, posting my blogs, and then my podcast and, you know, running the reports for me. And, you know, at one point, you were doing all of my social media and like, I can’t even list all of the things that that you do for me, because I don’t ever think about I don’t miss them at all. And, yeah, so. Um, yeah. And that really did create so much space for me to go out and start talking to more people and start creating those relationships, and start thinking about what do I want my business to look like? And how do I make it look like that? Right, all of that freedom, all of that margin that I created. And it was an investment because and the way I distinguish between an expense and investment and expense is something that you don’t have future benefit from. Right. But working with you has created future benefit for me because I am learning the things, you know, from you because you work with other business owners, right and you’ve done things that I haven’t yet done in my business so I’m actually learning from you, which does create future better benefit. And not only that, but it creates future benefit in the things that you know how I get to grow my business because I have you on the team and have you working hard for me and bringing me different ways that I can make my business more efficient, the different ways I can structure things, to make it easier, make it less painful, all of those things. So definitely an investment, definitely an appreciation in value and great appreciation for what you do for. I love hearing all that. Because yeah, that’s what like, I want to partner with my clients, I don’t just want to be, you know, get stuff done, like I want to partner with you and really help you grow. And so it’s, it’s great to hear that. You feel that way, too.
I feel like the message in what Lynda and I were talking about is that investment in yourself is always a good investment, and investment that gives you freedom in your business to do and to create what you’re best at doing and creating is a good investment. So you’re investing in freedom, which is exactly the theme of October is freedom. So not only does that give you more freedom, but it facilitates and accelerates your growth. When you’re willing to invest in yourself. When ever you are willing to bet on yourself. You will always win. And that is one of the messages that came out of my retreat this past weekend elevate retreat here in Nashville, Tennessee happened last weekend. It was fabulous. It was amazing. And we had so many good things come out of that retreat and that was one of the things every time you invest on your in yourself, every time you bet on you, you will win. And so whether you’re investing in a VA, whether you’re investing in a coach, whether you’re investing in a new skill set, a new tool, a new software application, no matter what you’re investing in, when you make that the right decision for you, when you decide that you’re doing it right, no matter what. And you bet on you, and you trust in yourself, and then you will win. So that’s the message I want to take you to take away from that little excerpt.
Yeah, I was a birth doula like pregnancy, birth, postpartum babies, like it was my life. And so I always sort of just identified politically as a pro choice because I knew that I could love and support other people for making that choice. But what happened? Aha that I’m having as you were talking is like there’s lots of other people’s choices that we can love them for. But what happened in my own unplanned pregnancy was I had to love myself for making the choice. It was like oh, I can love you if you’re having a hard time but I but really, like it’s way harder to love me like I cannot judge you but can I not judge myself? Yeah, um, and we always struggle more with how we treat ourselves than we do with how we treat other people and so I was the person who said all the time like well you know if I if I get pregnant I was probably meant to have a baby like keep the baby babies are also kids are awesome i love mothering. Um and so to make that choice and be faced with like truly loving myself through that, like such mind blowing expansion of who I was in the world Yeah, and that process of learning to love yourself despite any circumstance despite any decision despite any right anything on locks so much free to oh my god I’m having another moment Jill and it’s a money moment because yesterday I you might hear some people have papers are shuffling because yesterday I was getting coach and what I wrote in like gigantic words on a piece of paper was a hope that up so I can see. I know that on this podcast, you’re not gonna see it but my messy notes you probably can’t even read it but it said is the way I feel about money is the way my clients feel about abortion. And I’m noticing as we’re talking I have this similar feeling about like, well you can make a bunch of money you can get paid well for your coaching other people can reach their goals other people can have thriving businesses, but I can’t like I can love you and believe you’re not a bad person because you’re wealthy but can I love myself and believe I’m not a bad person as I become as I gain more wealth like my exact same thing exists I have I know I know dying right now. I’m so this is like a huge aha for me and very much tied into some of my money lies like I have a lot of beliefs about money that I don’t want to have and they’re but they’re so ingrained in me and like it is it has been a source of consistent struggle for me is charging, owning my worth believing it’s worth it, like trusting the value like it should all be free, everyone should get my work for free. So this has been a big struggle for me but seeing just like, seeing this connection right here, where like it’s okay if other people are successful if other people make money, other people have money. But can I love myself when I am that person with with wealth, and I had like I had a really big income month last year for for my business, not last year, last month in September. It created a lot of freakout, like oh shit, tell us about this. We’re on your Oh, that’s okay. That part out? Um, if I keep making this amount of money, what does that mean? What does that mean about who I am and what I do? And it started up a lot. That’s why I think a lot I knew who I’m becoming. Yeah, and who I’m becoming? And can I love myself? Through the success in the wealth through? Yeah, with this, with this dollar amount attached to who I am.
That was definitely one of my favorite conversations to have. There’s so many aha moments. So you know, when you’re talking about freedom in your business, when you’re talking about how you experience that freedom, just wants you to consider what are you resisting? What is holding you captive? Because a lot of times those things that you’re resisting are subconscious, you feel that resistance, I guarantee you that if you’re listening to this, you feel some kind of resistance, you feel some kind of heaviness, you feel some kind of weight, a lot of my clients describe it as something pressing on their chest, or something constricting their throat. That’s how a lot of my clients describe how they feel in their business, how they feel about making money in their business, how they feel about becoming successful, becoming wealthy. And when you feel that that’s when I want you to explore what are you resisting? What is holding you captive? Because freedom does not feel like somebody’s sitting on your chest. I guarantee you that.
So what do you need to let go of in order to experience freedom in making money in your business in building wealth, for you, for your family, for your future? Do you think it’s greedy? Do you think it’s selfish? Do you think that you shouldn’t want more? Do you think that you can’t want more if you already have enough, you should be grateful for what you have, you shouldn’t want more. That’s what a lot of my clients feel like and that is not free. So if you want to experience true freedom in your business, there are going to be some things that you’re going to have to explore and some money beliefs, some money lies that you’re going to have to let go of, and I just listed a bunch of them. Yours may be a little bit different. But that’s what I want you to think about.
As you know, I was at Elevate retreat. That was my first retreat that I’ve ever hosted. And that was last weekend. And it was absolutely amazing. It was here in Nashville, Tennessee. I had such an awesome time. I felt so good. I felt so proud of myself. I felt so proud of all of the women that showed up at that retreat and showed up as one 100% them, it was unlike anything that I have ever done in my business, it was so rewarding. It was so fulfilling, and it was so powerful. And there’s so much freedom that was unlocked at that retreat. So I just think that this timing worked out perfectly, because now I am wrapping up October, I’m wrapping up the theme of freedom. And some of the Freedom moments that came out of that retreat were just unbelievable, and so incredibly compelling. Now, I have already set or already chosen dates for next year’s retreat, and they’re tentative, so plus or minus one or two days on either end. But those tentative dates in case you want to mark your calendar in case you don’t want to miss out this next year when I do this retreat again, because you know, the first retreat is kind of like the first pancake, it’s not as pretty, still tastes as good, it’s still just as tasty, but it’s not quite as pretty as the second, third, and so on. So if you don’t want to miss it, then mark your calendars September 21, through the 25th. And go and get on the list. To get notified of all the juicy details. You can go to Jill Wright Coaching.com jillwrightcoaching.com/elevate-retreat and you can go ahead and put your information in there and get notified of all the details, I’m going to be touching base with you. With the people that are on that list about every month or so. And keeping in touch and letting you know when those dates are solidified when the venue is solidified, it will be here in Nashville again. But I totally want you in the room. There is just nothing like the in person energy that you have in that room. It was just so valuable. There were there were a couple of points where we were physically connected with each other’s energy. It was really profound, really powerful energy really powerful vibration. Just at such a higher level. I’m telling you that I did not miss the mark when I named this retreat, elevate. Because when we were in the room together, and when we were supporting each other and connecting with each other, we were lifting each other up and being lifted up in that energy will elevate you, I guarantee you lifting, being lifted up in that collective gratitude that collective love and light and support. Even when you’re in the midst of exploring the darkest, darkest depths of your soul. You can be lifted up in love and invite in that collective energy. And it’s so much better to explore those things. In that type of energy, when we can lift you back out of that hole that you’ve been willing to go in and explore is so much is so powerful. And when you know that there are a dozen people around you ready to lift you back out of that whole ready to hoist you up in their shoulders and celebrate you. It is so much easier to be willing to explore those dark emotions, those dark places, when you know that you’re not going to get stuck in it, because somebody is going to lift you back out of that it was so powerful. So make sure you mark your calendars for September 21 through the 25th 2022 here in Nashville, Tennessee, and get on that list so that you can get all the details and I’ll see you next week.