On the weekends, I’m not usually very intentional, if I’m being honest. Going into the weekend I’m always so optimistic about how I will use my extra time on the weekend and get so much done. Before I know it, it’s Sunday night and I’m feeling really disappointed about what I didn’t get done. Ugh!
It’s eerily similar to years ago when I was living paycheck to paycheck and not living on a budget. I was always very optimistic about how much debt I would pay off or how much I would put in savings and before I knew it, my paycheck was gone with no debt paid off and nothing left over.
How does this happen? It’s frustrating.
How it happens is I’m not focused on the right things. I either don’t decide ahead of time and commit to what I’ve decided or I don’t keep my commitment to myself. I let my survival brain control my weekend.
If I really want to get these things done, I need to make that commitment and I need to follow through and keep that commitment. I’ve seen myself fall for this over and over again, so I should be able to plan for this and guard against it.
What this looks like is I decide what result I want, what I want to accomplish, by Sunday night. I consciously choose those things that I want to focus on. I decide what is essential to accomplishing my goal and I schedule the time on my calendar to do these things. I plan for obstacles and I have strategies for overcoming those obstacles.
I want you to see what this might look like using The Model. For those that are not familiar with the model, check out my Facebook Live videos that I posted in January 2019 at www.Facebook.com/MoreMoneyCents. Essentially The Model says that we have thoughts about our circumstances. Our thoughts create our feelings. Our feelings lead us to act a certain way or do/not do certain things and our actions or inaction produce our results or our outcomes.
I’m going to use the example that I want to accomplish the project of creating a new course for my cheetahs (the women that I want to help create amazing results in their life after their divorce). The Result in my model will look like this:
C: Project
T:
F:
A:
R: I created an amazing new course for my Cheetahs
The reason I stated my result in the past tense is because I am assuming that I achieve the result and I’m looking to my future self that has achieved this result as my mentor in completing this model where this result happens.
In order to create this result, what is it I need to do? How do I need to act or show up for this result to happen for me? This adds the Actions to the model.
C: Project
T:
F:
A: I conduct research, gather data, write material, ask for feedback from trusted
advisors.
R: I created an amazing new course for my Cheetahs
In order to show up and do these things, what would I need to feel? When I feel this way, these actions will naturally follow for me. This adds the Feeling to the model.
C: Project
T:
F: Inspired
A: I conduct research, gather data, write material, ask for feedback from trusted
advisors.
R: I created an amazing new course for my Cheetahs
In order to feel inspired, which is the feeling I think will lead me to do the things I need to do to lead to the result I want, what would I need to believe to make me feel inspired? This adds the Thought to the model.
C: Project
T: My Cheetahs deserve to know that they can feel the same peace and freedom I
have experienced.
F: Inspired
A: I conduct research, gather data, write material, ask for feedback from trusted
advisors.
R: I created an amazing new course for my Cheetahs
So, the thought that my cheetahs deserve to know that this is available to them would inspire me to create an amazing course for them. When I practice believing this thought, I feel more and more inspired and I naturally complete these things and create the course.
The other option to create this course is to white knuckle my way through it. While this is definitely an option, can you see how that might still not produce the best result? Because I’m not addressing my thoughts about it and not coming from a place of integrity, it might take longer, it might get done or not get done, even if it gets done, it might suck. Can you see how coming from a place of inspiration can produce the result so much more positively and naturally and require less energy, will power, discipline and perhaps even less time?
Both are options, but the point is that the option I go with is my choice to make. I could have other options as well. I could choose a different result. I could choose a different feeling, which might produce different actions. If I’m feeling resourceful, that might lead me to outsource the course to someone more skilled at producing courses on the topic of choice. If I’m feeling collaborative, I might consult some experts that are willing to work with me to create the course. And different thoughts might lead to each of these. And each of those thoughts I might try on to see which produces the result I want. I would practice the thought I choose and I would practice believing in the result.
This is the magic of thought work. We become empowered to produce whatever we want in our lives instead of being at the effect of our thinking and what we perceive as circumstances outside our control.
Using this work, we can become more discriminating about what we focus on in our lives. And this will help us reach our goals more quickly. When we focus on things that are not essential, it diverts our energy, our time, our attention, our money from our goals. Try walking in a straight line toward a destination. Then try walking to the right, then diagonally to the left, then back to the right, then back to the left in a random zigzag pattern. To get to the same destination, you will have to take more steps and it will take you longer to arrive. This is what happens when we focus on the non-essential.
Take a look at the things you’re focusing on. Why are you focusing on these things? Do the thought work around these thoughts and become more intentional on what you want to focus on.
If you need help identifying the thoughts that are leading you to focus on things that don’t lead to your desired results, book a free session to get some valuable insight on this. Grab Your Spot!
#FocusOnTheEssential #JillTheMoneyCoach #DoTheWork #ItsWorthIt
Twenty years ago, Jill Wright was in debt and living paycheck to paycheck. Through focus and hard work, over the years she and her husband built a nest egg that allowed them to retire in 2018 at ages 50 and 53.
Jill heard God’s call to help other women repaint their own financial future and was eager to answer it. She left her corporate job and became a Financial Confidence Coach. Jill loves helping women give up shame around spending so that they can stop stressing about their money.
She helps strong generous women go from feeling weighed down by their finances to feeling in control so they can focus on being present with their family and building a life they love.